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Returned to owner; class-A amnestic administered; recovery agent reprimanded.

Item Description: An HB pencil which cannot be used to write, and only draws photorealistic images of Jimi Hendrix eating various foods.

Date of Recovery: ██-██-████ Location of Recovery: ███████, ████████ Current Status: Incinerated.

Any liquid drunk from glass reported to taste like P████ brand cola.

Date of Recovery: ██-██-████ Location of Recovery: Site-19 Current Status: Destroyed after being dropped by canteen worker █████ ███████.

Item Description: A .500 ███ ██████ sidearm that discharges all loaded cartridges as if they were blanks.

Date of Recovery: ██-██-████ Location of Recovery: ██████████, ████ Current Status: In storage.

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In room where it was placed, a giggling sound would be noted whenever lights were turned off. Item Description: An adult male capybara () several thousand miles away from the natural habitat for its species, with bright blue and green fur.